Interview with anonymous-villain from The Legend of Zelda
Welcome, anonymous-villain! First of all, thank you for gracing us with your notorious presence. Let’s dive right in. How did you come to find yourself as the central antagonist in the Kingdom of Hyrule’s darkest times?
Ah, the pleasure is all mine, really—who wouldn’t want to boast about their grand schemes on such a platform? As for how I found myself here, let’s just say that when one has a penchant for power and a triforce of ambition, a kingdom like Hyrule becomes the perfect playground. When you combine my cunning strategizing skills with the miserable lack of security in Hyrule, it was a match made in…well…let’s just say, not heaven.
How do you see Link and his incessant quest to restore the Triforce of Wisdom and rescue Princess Zelda?
The Legend of Zelda
Link? That pointy-eared child is but a walking amalgamation of irritating persistence. He’s like a mosquito who just won’t leave you alone, despite every swat. Of course, it’s amusing to watch him stumble through my cunningly placed traps and labyrinthine dungeons. Sometimes, I almost feel sorry for the kid. Almost.
You’ve designed incredibly challenging dungeons and obstacles for Link. Any particular favorites?
Oh, the dungeons are my pride and joy! If I had to pick a favorite, it would be the infamous Level 6: The Dragon. It’s immensely gratifying to know that countless players have been driven to madness by those Wizzrobes and their relentless attacks. And let’s not forget the Darknuts! Ah, their stern, unforgiving defenses—music to my ears.
What’s your take on the various power-ups and hidden secrets scattered across the game? Are they a help or a hindrance to your plans?
Those ludicrous power-ups and secrets? A double-edged sword, really. On one hand, they irk me to no end. Why leave heart containers and upgraded weapons just lying around for any inexperienced hero to pick up? On the other hand, it adds an extra layer of challenge. Let the player think they’ve outsmarted me with a magical boomerang—only to send them into a room filled with extra treacherous traps. Mwahahaha!
Despite your best efforts, some players do manage to best you. What would you say to those valiant few?
Oh, they are indeed valiant, but also terribly masochistic—must be, to subject themselves to my magnificent torment! To those few who manage to defeat me, I tip my helm…just a smidge. Congratulations on your perseverance and enviable reflexes. Too bad it won’t be enough when I return—bigger and more malevolent!
What is your opinion on the game’s groundbreaking save feature?
The Hyrule Fantasy
Groundbreaking, yes. Annoying? Absolutely. The ability to save progress? It takes away my joy of completely resetting their efforts to zero upon failure. But, I must admit, this allows them to revel in their gradual descent into madness at a more measured pace. Gives us more time together, don’t you agree?
On a lighter note, were there any design elements or quirks put in by the developers that even you admire?
Hmm. I suppose I must begrudgingly admit a fondness for the soundtracks. Yes, even a wicked soul like mine can appreciate a good tune while orchestrating chaos. Those 8-bit melodies—they stick with you, don’t they? Like the perfect theme for a villain’s monologue.
As we wrap up, any final hints or insights you’d like to share with the players, perhaps something to help them on their journey?
Well, I won’t make it too easy, but let’s see…Ah, yes. Bombs are your friends, dear players. Some walls are not what they seem—give them a good explosion and, who knows, you might stumble upon a secret passage or a treasure trove. But tread lightly, not all hidden paths lead to salvation. Some, quite frankly, lead directly to your doom.
And finally, can we expect your return in future adventures, or is retirement on the horizon?
Retirement? Never! As long as there are kingdoms to conquer and heroes to thwart, I shall be there in some malevolent form or another. Consider this merely a phase—an introduction to my perpetual reign of villainy. Heroes beware, I shall return.
Thank you, anonymous-villain, for this enlightening and humorously sinister conversation. We eagerly await your next nefarious plan.
start your torture
The pleasure was all mine. Until next time, relish the darkness.
You can also read the Classic conversation of The Legend of Zelda here!
