Interview with the Mysterious anonymous-villain from Metroid
Greetings, anonymous-villain! It’s an honor to finally get a chance to talk to you. Let’s dive right in—how does it feel to be the mastermind pulling the strings behind the Space Pirates and the Metroid onslaught?
Ah, the pleasure is all mine! Well, imagine, if you will, the satisfaction of orchestrating a symphony of chaos from the comfort of a high-tech lair. It’s like playing a grand game of chess, if the pieces were bio-engineered monstrosities and the board were an intergalactic warzone. Nothing but the finest thrill for an intellect of my caliber.
Ridley
Quite the mental image! Now, tell us, what makes Samus Aran such a thorn in your side?
Samus Aran… ah yes, the perpetual party crasher. What irks me most is the gall of the woman—strutting into MY domain in that incessantly flashy power suit, firing at everything that moves as if the place were her personal shooting gallery. Oh, and don’t get me started on her tendency to weaponize everything in sight. I mean, it’s not fair, really. My poor minions don’t even get health insurance!
Did the game developers intentionally make Samus overpowered, or was it a flaw in your defense systems?
A classic case of developer favoritism. They hand her power-ups like they’re candy at a parade. High-jump boots? Ice beam? Don’t even get me started on the morph ball! Ever tried catching someone who can slip through cracks like a doughnut through a coffee mug? It’s utterly preposterous. And don’t think I haven’t noticed those suspiciously placed energy tanks, just lying around like breadcrumbs for a pesky goose.
Speaking of power-ups, do you think players find it difficult to locate all those hidden secrets?
Difficult? Ha, I would call it downright diabolical! A hidden missile tank here, an E-tank there—these are no mere Easter eggs; they’re Machiavellian traps designed to test the patience of mere mortal gamers. Kudos to those who manage to unearth them! They’ve earned my begrudging respect—though I’d never admit that to their faces, of course.
THE Metroidvania
What’s your opinion on the environments of Brinstar and Norfair? Any favorite locations?
Ah, Brinstar and Norfair—my little slices of heaven! Brinstar’s lush caverns have a certain charm, and Norfair’s blistering heat reminds me of a cozy fireplace. But my favorite spot has to be the part where lava spontaneously erupts from the ground. Nothing says Welcome to Zebes like navigating a fie- hotfoot across magma streams. It’s like Mother Nature herself wants to roast our guests.
What can you reveal about Ridley and Kraid’s roles in your grand scheme?
Ah, my trusted lieutenants! Ridley and Kraid are the yin and yang of villainy. Ridley is as calculating as he is ferocious—a perfect attack dog, but even he gets riled up at the sight of Samus. Kraid, on the other hand, is a mountain of a creature with an equally colossal appetite. Together, they represent the formidable muscle behind my master plan. Of course, their shortcomings become my headaches… but I digress.
Many players consider Metroid one of the most challenging games. What’s your take on the difficulty level?
Challenging? Let’s call it an initiation rite! I’ve poured my heart, soul, and a potpourri of hazardous traps into Zebes. The maze-like layout is no accident—it’s a work of art designed to break spirits and test fortitude. If you manage to beat that, consider me grudgingly impressed. But I assure you, it wasn’t for lack of trying on my part to thwart you at every turn.
Samus Aran
Any quirks or secrets the developers threw in that you found particularly amusing or troublesome?
Where do I even start? The developers had this particularly cruel sense of humor—like burying essential power-ups in caverns you’d only find by bombing every pixel. But the real kicker? The infamous Justin Bailey code. A clever trick for the players, but an absolute nightmare for my minions who can’t handle a Samus without her suit. Not to mention, her mobility is just unfair at that point!
As we wrap up, any hints or ominous warnings for those who think they can best you in your lair?
Ah, to those brave (or foolish) enough to think they’ve beaten me—remember, the wheel of fate turns unpredictably. A return is always possible, and the challenge will be more daunting than ever. Or perhaps I shall retire and let the galaxy breathe easy… until a new plan drifts into my devious mind. Until then, keep those blasters charged and your wits sharper than my lurid traps. Farewell, for now!
Thank you for the delightful chat, anonymous-villain! To all our readers, stay vigilant, keep exploring, and never underestimate the mind behind the mayhem.
The pleasure was mine. May your pixels prosper and your saves be frequent!
Comments