Faxanadu NES: Interview with the Delightfully Devious Villain

Interview with anonymous-villain from Faxanadu

Greetings, anonymous-villain! Thank you for taking the time to speak with us today. Let’s dive right in: How do you feel about being the main antagonist in Faxanadu?

Ah, the irony of being the hero’s eternal thorn in the side is truly delectable! While the elves quiver and quake, I revel in sewing chaos and despair. Let’s face it, if it wasn’t for my masterful meddling, the Elven kingdom would be a dreadfully boring place. Elevating the mundane to magnificent disaster is my true calling!

That does sound rather menacingly delightful. Speaking of the hero, what’s your take on the lone warrior who keeps thwarting your plans?

Pfft! The so-called hero is nothing more than a meddlesome gnat. If it weren’t for those infernal power-ups and hidden secrets scattered by the developers, he’d be cannon fodder. He prances around, collecting gold and mantras as if it’s some grand achievement. Newsflash, I’m the one orchestrating the real show here!

Interesting perspective! Are there any specific game elements that you believe give the hero an unfair advantage?

Oh, where do I even begin? Let’s talk about those nifty little power-ups and hidden items. Really, developers? You’re just going to leave a Dragon Slayer sword laying around? And don’t even get me started on the magic spells. Lightning Bolt? More like Plot Convenience Bolt. Players, if you’re reading this, keep an eye on hidden alcoves and suspicious walls. That’s where the real loot is stashed.

Sounds like some players might appreciate those tips! What challenges did you specifically enjoy creating for the hero?

Ah, watching the hero flounder through the Tower of Suffer is pure bliss! Spikes, pitfalls, and relentless monsters—oh my! Each biome is a carefully crafted gauntlet meant to break their spirit. The bewildering labyrinths of the Fortress of Mist and the relentless foes of the Misty Swamp are also particular favorites. Nothing says ‘maniacal genius’ like a well-placed invisible platform.

You’re just going to leave a Dragon Slayer sword laying around?

Since you’re spilling the beans, any quirky insights about the game’s development tied to your nefarious shenanigans?

Oh, the stories I could tell! There was a point in development where the designers toyed with making the sky rain cucumbers instead of meteorites. Can you imagine? It would’ve turned my reign of terror into a vegetable extravaganza. Thankfully, cooler heads prevailed, and we stuck to the flaming rocks of doom. Fun fact though: The fountains were initially intended to restore health, but I vetoed that idea. Thank me later!

We’ve heard that some players manage to defeat you. What do you think about those victorious few?

The ones who manage to overcome my myriad of obstacles? They’re a curious breed, undeniably stubborn. Honestly, commendable tenacity, but don’t think for a second that I’m impressed. Reaching the end only means you’ve seen the tip of my iceberg. Sure, you’ve got some fancy titles and mantras, but true conquest is my domain alone.

What advice would you give to players struggling to get past some of the tougher parts of the game?

Well, if you must persist, remember to save your game at the sage shrines. Those wily old sages are far more useful than they appear. Keep your eyes peeled for secret shops in town—some particularly powerful items are deliberately tucked away to test your wits. Also, patience and timing on those pesky sprites and wyverns go a long way. Balance caution with aggression, but never—ever—underestimate my minions. They’ll strike when least expected!

Any last words or hints about what’s next for anonymous-villain? Retirement or perhaps a grand return?

Retirement? Ha! Hardly. I’ve got plans within plans. Let the hero have their fleeting moment of glory. As for my return, let’s just say: presumed victory is the prelude to an even grander defeat. Keep those swords sharp, heroes… I’ll be back, with even more diabolical schemes!

We’ll be waiting with bated breath! Thank you, anonymous-villain, for sharing your dastardly insights. Until next time!

Until then, may your nightmares be ever in my favor! Mwahaha!